The fireworks wars of ’96 will go down as legend. We the residents of 3529 emerged victorious over the attackers from 3524. We crushed them. It all began on the evening of August 12th, at just after 9pm. They initiated the attack with an unprovoked deployment of a chain of black cats that lasted almost a minute. Obviously we couldn’t let this stand, and responded immediately with a barrage of bottle rockets. It wasn’t long before both sides had deployed roman candles and assorted other launchy explody munitions. The assault lasted close to an hour with heavy smoke inhalation and lighter burns on fingers suffered on both sides. The decisive blow came when we deployed a series of custom made improvised devices directly & simultaneously down the chimney and through the living room window of 3524. The residents evacuated and surrendered almost immediately.
Please discard any comments or statements by the residents of 3524 unless they confirm the above report, as they are liars and not to be trusted.